I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
This random guy just introduced himself then said "So, I am staying at my friends place and he has a 4 year old, so we should probably go back to your house." WTF kind of vibes do I give off?
here I sit at Southern Illinois' finest pubs and I thought I heard your laugh. I was sadly astonished to turn and find a midget cracking herself up reading the label on her can of chewing tobacco...
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone put a huge skyy vodka bottle in our washing machine. My roommate didn't see it and ran it. The washing machine split in two. #life
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
Randomize