:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Since I fall down so much at parties I've started doing this new thing where when I fall I just yell FLOOR PARTY and make people bring the party to me
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
My boobs just got me out of my third ticket last night
i'm so proud. i woke up to nearly seven feet of basketball player in my bed this morning
you win. again.
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
Matched with the lumberjack. Here's your wedding invite.
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
Randomize