So I just opened the bag you gave me and those panties aren't mine...
oh
i'm pretty sure god just pointed at me and laughed
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
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