omg omg i just fucked paul. i need to stop doing this kind of thing.
wait, who's paul?
exactly.
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
OPIZZABONMYDICK
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's 5am and I have yet to fall asleep. At what point do we just accept that I run on vodka?
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
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