hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
Just saw a bouncer shoot a stripper with a squirt gun. He looked at me n said,"gotta keep em in check." I'm in love with this place
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
You are not allowed to borrow my car ever again. It smells like a hobo orgy happened in my backseat with a hint of onion. What did you do.
I wore a firefighters hat and drank beer all night. They had to drive me home after breaking the beer pong table, they told me I was welcome back tonight though...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
Hey, what did you end up doing with those ski goggles?
Anything is possible. I didn't even know I was wearing the toilet cover as a hat
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
my god I love twenty year old dicks
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
Randomize