I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
those girls across the street saw me hanging my towel off of my penis...they're coming over later
my boobs just fell out on the dance floor. my wedding is totally beating your wedding
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
The guy had great intentions when throwing us free beer off the balcony... but of course I was the one to get hit in the face because that's the kind of luck I have
i wish i could tell my students that all of their lessons plans were brought to them by captain morgan and diet coke. it's like seasame street, only for high schoolers being taught by a student teacher.
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
Randomize
