Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
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