Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
he is literally lying on the floor eating cookies. doing nothing. and as i was hitting him he needed to protect the cookies more than himself.
23 Theme Park Employees Confess The Biggest Adult Tantrums They’ve Witnessed
I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
Chipotle just hit me... I want to go sit in the corner of the shower and cry until morning.
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
Reasons why I love cats more than people: 1. They're not fucking people.
I'm spending tomorrow doing taxes and making jello shots. Is this adulthood?
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
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