If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
He just used my bikini trimmer to give himself a fumanchu. And I still plan on having sex with him tonight. This has to be what true love feels like.
I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
I used his computer to order the pizza and the only thing he had in his search bar was 'text NASA'
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
He changed the password on his Netflix account. The break up is official.
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
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