wat bout pragnant strippers??
I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
My fight-or-flight response is really more fight-or-fuck
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
Apparently he proposed after he saw me chug vodka out of a traffic cone.
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
I keep picking up boring men who literally just want to cuddle. HOW AM I THIS BAD AT GETTING SEX?
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
I'm really busy with my period
Randomize
