Also I am about to cut a ringtone from "Sex Machine" so James Brown can tell me to "get up, get on up" in the morning
I once woke up to the scream from 'get up offa that thing' and smacked my head on my desk
He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
It's the never-ending clusterfuck that is my love life
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
Randomize