I want to jerk off but my dog won't leave me alone. It's the most depressing cock block ever.
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
On second thought, trying to signify she was a butter face by wiping my bagel on her cheek may not have been in my best of interests
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
What's a nice way of saying 'I wish I hadn't fucked you.'
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize
