Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
Roman Polanski is more welcome at my daughter's birthday party than you are at that bar
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
My penis needs a shock collar
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
Randomize
