Whoa Z and x make the same sound
I don't know which is more embarrassing, the fact that I shat on the floor today or that I told you about it.
i wanna stay in my bed and fart for a few more hours
You look just like Jennifer Aniston on food.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
I need to talk about my life with someone. Preferably with someone who hasn't tried to jizz on me
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
I need an outfit that says "thanks for hiring me" but also says "i want dick in my mouth".
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