And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
I got drunk and applied for two credit cards last night. About to find out if anyone in this world is still dumb enough to give me credit.
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
You know you're sufficiently drunk when the 411 dude just says, "Fuck it! I'll Google that shit for you, what movie do you want to see?" and proceeds to give you showtimes for 3 different theatres.
I just passed a kid trying to leave on a lawn mower
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
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