I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
You know you need to hit the gym when you're not strong enough to get the cork outta the wine bottle. And you know you're a drunk when that's the only motivation to do exercises
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
Hey, it's not my fault that you had a shitty bed frame that couldn't handle the rough sex you're into.
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
I thought it was your cat but I was wrong your Roomba is possessed by a pissed-off evil spirit.
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