i just pissed myself at work. maybe they'll buy the old coffee spill trick
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
I still think it's messed up that you're naming your kids after all the guys you slept with in college
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
I just can't do Wednesdays sober anymore
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
Randomize
