At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
I was late because I helped this old romanian lady mow her lawn at 2AM.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
Eating pizza in the bath tub while watching a romantic comedy alone. I reached a new level of single.
I am listening to Jack Johnson and wearing the sweater your Mother made me fuck mother nature I am in my happy place right now
Do you know who these girls are? They're baking a cake, making chicken enchiladas, and bringing me beer everytime I finish one.
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