went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
My mom is such a hoarder. I found a deer candelabrum last night, it had antlers has candle holders. It was like a redneck menorah.
My dealer, who also happens to be a male stripper, just invited me to watch him perform tonight. Boundaries buddy, boundaries.
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
Life is my bitch right now. The bouncers tried to carry me out of the club, but everyone thought I was crowd surfing so everyone carried me BACK IN. Winning as fuck.
Hey sorry for being annoying last night, I just realized how many times I yelled "JORDAN!" during and after playing pong.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
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