Kris Allen: Jason Mraz mixed with John Mayer and a splash of orgasmmm
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
She told me she eats fruit when she's hungover because it has more water than water.
I AM SENDING THIS TEXT MESSAGE SO I DON'T LOOK AT HIM. THANK YOU FOR RECEIVING IT.
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
CTFD. There’s plenty of dick in the sea! This is Vegas, we import dick. \nWorst case scenario we get a rental penis
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