You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
Um, you were throwing up the shocker symbol in front of all of the wedding guests during the best man's speech. No wonder the groom thinks we're bad
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
So I'm texting her. How do I steer the conversation toward "I honestly would be fine never seeing you again"?
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
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