"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?
head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way
You were so drunk you decided to go out of the car window instead of using the door, once you realized what you had just done you said fuck it and went back in through the window
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
He wanted me to choke him with my feet. So now I feel obligated to start writing my memoir
That portion can talk about stepping out of your comfort zone and how it can potentially kill people
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
I've needed to start drinking protein shakes to keep up with her. It's like my dick just started doing crossfit.
I baked a frozen pizza completely, put it back in the plastic and box, and put it back in the freezer. THAT drunk.
Randomize
