she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
Why is there a cactus in the microwave?
Don't worry about it.
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
Do you think I threw out my left shoulder during the keg stand or the stripper pole? It's medically relevant my chiropractor wants to know.
Oh wait looks like my cousin is getting deported THERE'S HOPE FOR THIS CHRISTMAS YET
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
Randomize
