shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
dude i feel like at any given point 3/5 of that family is trying to fuck you
Oh my god my life; so much cake and so little sex
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
I'm offering you baseball tickets and my vagina, isn't that enough?
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
I'm by myself. some Midwest chick is hitting on me because I gave her a deviled egg. I need the distraction.
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
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