Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
I'm the only person who goes to break up a friends with benefits and comes out with a boyfriend
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
admittedly, geting that drunk in front of my last two exes wasnt a good idea
probably didn't help that you cheated on them with each other either
I know it's super late on a work night, but can you drop by and bend me over my new motorcycle? I have tequila and tacos...
Randomize
