I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.
I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
And tell the hostess not to worry, she's narcoleptic and fell asleep on the way to the bar, but she'll be fine in a few minutes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
Randomize