He about cried when I ordered pizza online. He said it was a miracle.
I was thinking about baking his mom "sorry you found out i was sleeping with your son" cupcakes
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
I got us chalkboard mugs. Now whoever comes home with us can feel comfortable in the morning! I am too considerate to my one-night stands...
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
Randomize
