I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
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I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
I don't have any swimsuits that don't show off the weird handprint bruises on my hips. Do you have a onepiece I can borrow?
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
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