whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
This guy at the party just introduced himself to me as "the guy who sat behind you on a plane last year"
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
I had a dream that I had to take a breathalyzer but then it turned out to be a bong....why can't that be real life?
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
I blame everything on you. My broken heart, my fucked up liver and my twisted mind.
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
Randomize