I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
We left the knife in your bed.
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
Randomize
