But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
Dude. He only had one testicle. It was like his whole package was a Muppet Show character coming at me.
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
Oh god. It's like a broken faucet. My guts sound like a bilge pump clogged with golf balls and cake frosting.
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
the cop found his r2d2 bong and asked me if i ever smoked out of him. i'm like, no sir. he's like ahh. if i were to smoke, it'd definitely be out of some star wars character.
easily made my night.
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