Midget sex pt 2 tonight
Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
And the best part is I don't remember putting the condom in my pocket! Angels officially exist
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
You got me 4 pizzas and i just saw this. I'm too drunk for this shit. I just yelled "4 pizzas holy shit!" At the pizza dude
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You don't know the true meaning of fear until your girlfriend's niece insists on sitting on your lap with 20 mg of Viagra coursing through your veins.
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
What’s the level of adulting when you reschedule a dentist appointment to have a threesome?
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
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