Why are you ignoring all of my texts?
The power was out.
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
if you hear someone banging on your door early in the morning, it's me with some breakfast burritos, so don't be alarmed
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
It's one of the many facets of my drunken alter egos. I'm like substance abuse batman.
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
My Sexting was not on an AP level
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
Randomize
