and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
I woke up and my panties were thumbtacked to his wall. Out of my reach.
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
I thought he put a fake swan in my yard, but no, he put a real life swan in my yard
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
I gave him a HANDJOB.
But then he finished from a handjob in under two minutes so who's really laughing?
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
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