he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
Drunk assassins creed leads to explaining to my father that "it was only a steak knife in the arm"
Tolerating him while I'm not drunk is like trying to find a word that rhymes with orange
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
I was giving him a blowjob but we had to stop because he started crying when his cat walked in and started staring at us
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
i wish i could say that was the first 40 year old woman from the circus I nailed
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
Randomize
