I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
We exchanged snapchat usernames instead of numbers. Is that what America has come to?
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can we make 2014 the year of no unsolicited dick pics?
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
Of course, you have to give the courtesy text like last night when I told you my dick was gonna smell like peppermint
You gotta own your makeout pics Matt. They're like badges of honor
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
Randomize