My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
There's a woman at the bar holding a baby with one arm and doing shots of GM with the other. The baby is crying. I have lost faith in humanity.
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
You fell out of his top bunk onto his set of golf clubs. After seeing blood on your leg, you proceeded to sing "the first cut is the deepest" while sprawled on the golf clubs
Randomize
