u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
I ran out of diet so I'm mixing captain with a juice box. Being a mom has finally paid off.
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
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