He's married, but his wife isn't my neighbor so I don't feel bad about coveting him.
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What can I say, I bounce back quick. Never thought the line "my turtle died" would get me so many free drinks last night
I'm slightly possesive over the gucamole when i'm stoned.
Is that why you left peanut shells in my bed?
my revenge plans when i'm high are never as good as i think they are
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
We walking to the game and some random guy came up to to me and yelled "hey you're the whiskey guy!" And then high fived me then walked away
Randomize