OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
I'm sorry. But when a stripper driving a Bentley tells me I have potential..... I gotta at least listen to her proposal. God did not mean for me to waste these tits on law school.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
the japanese bartender dressed as a cowboy in assless chaps just told me i was too drunk for another shot
Hey man. We haven't met but my name is Ben. I threw up a bunch at your house last night. I heard you smoke though so I'll smoke you out anytime.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
Well, when you bump into your parents at a swingers meetup, it's time to change cities
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
I'm so high I have morphed into the monopoly man. Or maybe the Pringles guy. I don't know but I have a mustach now
Randomize
