I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
The only alcohol in the house was a bottle of Sherry. It's like cough syrup that I shotgunned off Strawberry Shortcake's ass.
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
A girl in McDonalds just asked if I was in here wasted a few nights ago throwing fries at the staff, I said it was my twin
We both know that wasn't me
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