brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
If there is ever a next time, care about me enough to lube it up no matter what my drunk ass says
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
I just found a 1/2 inch of mimosa in my shoe.
You should get more absorbent shoes.
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
my mom just told me its unladylike to have toothpaste stains on my clothes all the time.. if she only knew.
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im walking to an ob gyn practice session right now. Literally have to get face first in a middleaged vagina in 10 min.
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
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