The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
You said you brought chipotle into a movie and I asked you to marry me and you said yes
I'm the only person who goes to break up a friends with benefits and comes out with a boyfriend
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
Someone explain to me why I woke up to find a stolen shopping cart in my room...
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