What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
Very drunk. laura says hi. i can't find my pants. i think i'm in philly, but it might be jersey somewhere
I woke up to a text that said "You're a fucking asshole" Why is she so pissed at me?
Im guessing it has something to do with running up to her boyfriend screaming "THIS IS SPARTA" and kicking him in the balls.
Is that considered a cock block?
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
DUDE. HOLY FUCK MY PRINCIPAL WAS JUST MY UBER DRIVER. I AM LITERALLY TRAUMATIZED. ANS DRUNK. HOLY FUCK OMG
" my drug dealer just stopped by and did an elmo impression for my 2 year old nephew."
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround