"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
Never again let me pretend to be australian for free booze.
the majority of my texts from you are at 3 AM & consist of either "I'm drunk", "you're asian", or "bratwurst"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
In my defense, there are at least three ways to die doing that, and I'm still here. America, Fuck Yeah!
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
Randomize