She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
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You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
And at least you didn't have a dinner of Ranch Pringles and Double Stuff Oreos. I forgot that part of being single.
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
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Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
It's like an adderall Houdini. Right when you think you have a deal he disappears
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
Mike's my new hero. There's a flagpole of hook-up's bras on his porch and a week's supply of beer in his fridge but he still has a great job.