Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
He tugged on my tampon string and said 'there's a snake in my boot'. Needless to say he called me Woody and quoted Toy Story the rest of the night.
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
In the 2nd smartest move of my day your ringtone for when you call is now the Space Jam theme.
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
I, soberly, gave myself a concussion trying to take a pic of my vagina. Fuck you and your hangover.
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
Randomize
