There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
some girl just asked me how to spell unconscious. I really want to know what she was texting.
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
i asked if you wanted help changing your sheets after you threw up in bed. you politely declined. i take no responsibility after that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
He? As in you personified your dick?
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
All my friends are getting married and I'm pole dancing in a tattoo shop. I don't know how I feel about this.
They spent thousands on one day. You made $76 in 30 minutes. You should feel great about that.
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
Randomize