she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
Is it appropriate to put "Mommy and Daddys shitfaced-ness that led to Aubrey" on a birth announcement?
Well you two just had a kid in the middle of college, I dont think anyone will notice.
Thanks bro
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Listen, don't freak out when you walk out on me masturbating in front of my roommate. No homo. He just needs to be put to his place.
I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
Drunk yet?
Well I just did the worm on an empty dance floor while the bridesmaids were serving cake. You tell me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
You fell asleep mid blowjob with my vibrator in your HAND. So no, I will not bring you pizza.
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
My arm is completely dead, never again will i give you a 20 minute hand job. You better have enjoyed that asshole. I have to text with my left hand now.
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