i just google imaged poop.
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
Turns out vomit takes off spray tan.
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
He keeps trying to sell me the forks from his kitchen drawer
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
Only you would offer whiskey to a man in liver failure.
Randomize
