my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's basically me if I was an 8-yr-old boy. It's like looking into a pudgy terrifying mirror
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
Dude, no, you tried to sleep on the stove. I mean. You were pissed when I stopped you... but I couldn't have you catching on fire in my house.
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
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