: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
The best part was her genuine shock and total "I didn't know" look when we said she couldn't cook a steak in a microwave.
i love that he's uncircumcised. it makes handjobs so much easier. it's the lazy susan of penises.
It doesn't matter if I tell the story beginning to end or end to beginning, the story still starts with a random girl blowing me in the bathroom.
I forgot that I thought it would be a good idea to hairspray my toilet seat last night after I took 12 shots of vodka so when I just went to pee, I stuck to the toilet. Never drinking again.
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
He stole me a cantaloupe and we drunkenly broke into a park and ate it on a bench with my pocket knife. I think i need to marry him
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
He caught me shoving meatballs into my mouth using my hand. Fuck utensils. It’s Christmas...and this is why I’m single.
They are good meatballs.
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
Randomize